For Always
by BrittyWeasley
Summary: She was gone. The memories would have to suffice. She was gone, and there was nothing he could do about it. DN.


Summary: She was gone. The memories would have to suffice. She was gone, and there was nothing he could do about it. D/N.

Disclaimer: All of the stuff you recognize belongs to the goddess Tammy. I think that accounts for everything. I would say that I own everything, but then again I don't want copyright people coming and suing me. The song belongs to Faith Hill. It's called 'There You'll Be.'

For Always

_When I look back_

_On these times_

_And the dreams_

_We've left behind_

_I'll be glad 'cause_

_I was glad to get_

_To have you in my life_

The memories eat me up from inside, magelet. I remember the good and the bad, all the way back to that time so many years ago when you rescued me while I was stuck in hawk from. I can recall when we first kissed, first proclaimed our love to each other, like it was yesterday. You don't know how glad I am to have those memories, love.

Because they're all that I have left.

You don't know how much I regret showing you your wild magic now. If I hadn't, you might still be here with me.

But then again, we might not have come as far as we had gotten if I hadn't.

_In my dreams_

_I'll always see you soar_

_Above the sky_

_In my heart_

_There always be a place_

_For you for all my life_

_I'll keep a part of you with me_

_And everywhere I am_

_There you'll be_

The moment Alanna came into our rooms, two weeks ago, I automatically knew that something was amiss. I had never seen the Lioness cry, any quite frankly I never thought I would, but there she was in the doorway, gazing up at me with bloodshot eyes. "Numair..." she whispered.

"Yes?" was my reply.

"It's about Daine. Something went wrong while she was spying in Hamrkeng, and a shaman discovered her."

That was all she needed to say. The shaman had killed you. It was all just too much. Without thinking, I slammed the door in her face and threw myself on the bed. I lunged for your pillow, trying to capture your scent in my mind forever, even though you hadn't slept there for a week. My magelet, my darling, was dead, and there was nothing I could do about it.

Then it hit me.

Two weeks.

You were supposed to come home in two weeks. We were going to get married in two weeks.

The first tears finally fell onto your pillow.

I laid there for what seemed like only minutes to me, but for what could have been hours. I couldn't spend enough time alone with the memories.

And Mithros, were there memories. They flooded me. Even the littler things, like when Onua and Alanna would tease us mercilessly at the beginning of our relationship. I saw when we shared our first kiss. You had fallen off a cliff only to be attacked by spidrens, and we had just been reunited. See? After all these years I still remember...

_Well you showed me_

_How it feels_

_To feel the sky_

_Within me read_

_And I always_

_Will remember all_

_The strength you_

_Gave to me_

In a way, you actually did come home in two weeks. The least that King Maggot could do, it seemed, was to at least let us say goodbye. Raoul and a whole company of the King's Own journeyed to the Scanran capital to bring back your body.

And here I am right now, at your funeral. You look so peaceful, like you are sleeping. But deep down inside, I know that no matter how hard I don't want to know it, you'll never wake up.

Oh gods, magelet, is it beautiful. We're on the edge of the Royal Forest so you can be near us as well as the People. Everyone is here: Alanna, George, Onua, Sarge. Even Maura and the Long Lake Pack came all the way from Dunlath to say their farewells. But these are just the humans. You should see how many animals came to your burial.

A line is forming. It's time for us to say our goodbyes. Nobody has said anything, but they're letting me see you last. I thought I had cried myself dry, but tears continue to stream down my face. Out of the corner of my eye I see someone move towards me, but they're stopped.

_'Cause I always saw in you_

_My light, me strength_

_And I want to thank you_

_Now for all the ways_

_You were right there for me_

_You were right there for me_

_For always_

In my hand is something that was meant for you to wear once you came back. We picked them out a month ago, and I'm wearing mine on a chain right now, close to my heart. "It may not be official," I whisper, "But in my eyes we were married from the moment you said yes. I was supposed to put this on your finger today, and I keep my promises." I put the ring on your finger, trying so hard not to break down and cry again.

"A wise friend once told me something," I whisper. "'You never know what you have until it's gone.' Well, he was right. I had an amazing time here with you, but I still wish that you were here, for me to be able to say 'I love you' one last time.

_In my dreams_

_I'll always see you soar_

_Above the sky_

_In my heart_

_There always be a place_

_For you for all my life_

_I'll keep a part of you with me_

_And everywhere I am_

_There you'll be_

Just remember this: I will love your forever. No matter what, you will always be a part of me, until the day I see you again.

I love you, magelet. I will love you, with very beat of my heart.

For always.

Fin

A/N: wow. I finally finished it. Did you cry? My friend Mary read it before it was edited; she would have cried, except that we were in school. Thanks to Gir-Rory, Megan, Jenn, and Perri for reading it! Review!


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